Ways to Stop a Conversation Dead in Its Tracks: #67
/This week and next all the Gradys are back in California. Kind of a joint work+holiday trip. Well, it's work for me, holiday for the bride and critter, who is being shamelessly spoiled by her grandparents during our stay.
Every trip back is packed to the gills trying to fit in as many lunch/dinner/pick-your-eating-event visits with friends as we can. This serves two purposes: first - we get to spend time with People We Like. Second, we get to cram our pie-holes with the flavors we miss living overseas, like dim sum or sushi, or Taco Bell.
Last night, we left the critter with the grandparents and went out with my bride's grade school friend Patty, one of our Favorite People, and ate some of the good raw fish stuff. Somehow, the conversation drifted to my bride's baby shower several years ago.
Patty does an excellent Donna Reed impression. She was telling us how all the womens were sitting around in their proper lace dresses and hats and gloves, or whatever they wear to these things, and talking about the pending blessing to descend on our house (which would be accompanied by swearing and high levels of medication, and is overall a far more revolting process than anyone thinks to tell you about) I forget what I was out doing, but whatever it was, it was surely manly and testosterone-enhanced, involving fire and meat and car parts.
This was the conversation she related:
Woman in Hat: Oh, what do you think the sex will be? I hope it's a girl.
Woman in Gloves: Oh, I bet it will be a boy. She's carrying low.
Woman Sipping Tea: My sister had twin boys, she's so happy now.
Woman Wearing Pearls: Oh! Twins would be so nice!
...Group titter...
Our Other Good, but Generally Quiet in Large Gatherings Friend: It could be both you know. Research shows that babies born with dual sets of genitalia are increasingly common. It's a scientific fact.
... sound of pin dropping ...
I laughed so hard I cried when she told me that story. I told her that I am so going to tell the internet that story.